Plopped down in the fucking middle of the problem always. No preamble. No warning. You showed up all innocent and, like, “I’m ok. You’re ok.” Ha ha. Good luck with that.
You wanted to be part of them. Had driven/flown/walked all that way, had anticipated fun and sharing, the spark of ideas new to you, who could then respond, all alive and eager, tow-headed and about ten years old, no matter what your body says.
Only they got there first. I mean, the fact that they preceded you was the salient one, the one that you overlooked. They were a unit before you walked in asking to join. It was their territory, their sisterhood, and as we know from bee colonies, sisterhood is everything.
So go ahead. Try it again. Walk up in your white shirt with the peter-pan collar, your navy blue shorts, and your single barrette. Go ahead. No one is there to stop you.